No, he’s not an “introvert” and needs time to chill. No, he’s not “protecting you” by being silent. “I’m sorry if my taking care of myself hurts you,” really means “I’m hanging out with a new person (or supply).” He is stonewalling, giving you the silent treatment, and pulling a disappearance act.
This type of abuse is a way to control you. When you’re worried, hurting or upset, you are thinking about him, which is his end goal. He wants you to think about him while he is away. Another result of the silent treatment is to give him time with the new supply. He knows you will leave him alone and he will be able to do as he pleases. Even if you start out being angry, with enough silent treatment you will bend and break, eventually doing whatever it takes to have him back. What is even worse is you end up apologizing for his bad behavior. How’s that for control?!
Is this what you want? Can you afford such evilness and cruelty in your life?
The solution is this: No Contact. Muster up all you can. Educate yourself about narcissism. Find s therapist who KNOWS AND UNDERSTANDS these personality disorders. Take back control by blocking the narcissist. You’ll NEVER get what you need from this person. Snooping. Watching. Hearing about him only keeps YOU in chains, tethered to his cruelty, bringing him back into your life to create more abuse, mre chaos, more trauma.
Letting go is not easy. This is going to be the biggest challenge of your life. But you can do it.