Hello from Andrea

Greetings! I am Andrea, the author of Narcissist-Free.com. In July of 2014, I experienced a horrific discard and spent a full year trying to hide my anxiety, fear, grief, anger and longing while working full-time and raising my son as a single mom. Unless you have experienced emotional abuse, it is very difficult to understand what targets (aka victims, survivors, thrivers) endure. After a year of franticly searching for ways to make the pain and obsession go away, I found exactly what I needed to heal. I started this site in October 2016 (which also happens to be Domestic Violence Awareness Month) to give others the opportunity to heal with the help of the same authors, experts, bloggers, thrivers that I have met along the way. These amazing people fashioned, shaped and guided my recovery. May these same folks guide you too on your journey of emotional wellness.

Blessings,
Andrea

No, he’s not an “introvert” and needs time to chill. No, he’s not “protecting you” by being silent. “I’m sorry if my taking care of myself hurts you,” really means “I’m hanging out with a new person (or supply).” He is stonewalling, giving you the silent treatment, and pulling a disappearance act.

 

This type of abuse is a way to control you. When you’re worried, hurting or upset, you are thinking about him, which is his end goal. He wants you to think about him while he is away. Another result of the silent treatment is to give him time with the new supply. He knows you will leave him alone and he will be able to do as he pleases. Even if you start out being angry, with enough silent treatment you will bend and break, eventually doing whatever it takes to have him back. What is even worse is you end up apologizing for his bad behavior. How’s that for control?!

 

Is this what you want? Can you afford such evilness and cruelty in your life?

 

The solution is this: No Contact. Muster up all you can. Educate yourself about narcissism. Find s therapist who KNOWS AND UNDERSTANDS these personality disorders. Take back control by blocking the narcissist. You’ll NEVER get what you need from this person. Snooping. Watching. Hearing about him only keeps YOU in chains, tethered to his cruelty, bringing him back into your life to create more abuse, mre chaos, more trauma.

 

Letting go is not easy. This is going to be the biggest challenge of your life. But you can do it.

 

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2 Comments
  • anna

    I’m in a relationship with Narcissist! I’m about to leave for good and never look back!
    In my story, I have to deal also with his Narcissist mother.
    They make my life hell!
    I never had this kind of experience in my life, never!
    It’s demonic, It’s horrible, It’s pure evil!
    it’s very important to recognize the first sign of emotional manipulation and run as fast as you can!
    There are very charming at the beginning of the relationship, but after that is the beginning of the real trauma and real nightmare.
    Good luck to all people who were victims of Narcissist abuse!
    Stay strong!

    July 26, 2020 at 12:59 pm Reply
  • Zoe Chrsitian

    Loved this:

    Snooping. Watching. Hearing about him only keeps YOU in chains, tethered to his cruelty, bringing him back into your life to create more abuse, mre chaos, more trauma. Letting go is not easy. This is going to be the biggest challenge of your life. But you can do it.

    July 24, 2021 at 2:10 pm Reply
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